• Falling deeper into depression

    I had it all. A beautiful house, 2 amazing kids, a loving and supportive husband, a job I loved. We don't have a ton of extra money, but our home was overflowing with love.

    And then I found the messages between my husband and another woman. She lives in another state, so he never physically cheated, but this almost feels worse due to the circumstances.

    The messages spanned across 4 months. I went back in the messages between he and I during that time, to see if we were fighting or to find anything to justify it. What I found instead were messages sent to me saying "I love you, my queen. You're the only one I think about". And 1 hour later he sent her a message saying "somebody is thinking about you right now and touching themselves".

    He never gave me any indication anything was wrong. He just went and got attention elsewhere.

    I dont think I can ever trust him again. How will I ever believe him when he says I'm his only one?

    I think I could if we were having issues and he sought comfort elsewhere. I would, at least, be able to justify it in my mind. But not this.

    I am broken. I try to fake it so our 13yo doesnt know. But it's getting harder. I am not focused at work, my eyes get all blurry from tears constantly. I am sad, just very sad and I don't know what to do to make it better.

    I want my perfect life back.

    I am currently on lexapro for anxiety and depression, as this has been something I've struggled with for a long time, but it was working. I felt amazing, its just not enough to overcome heartbreak.

Responses

  • 14 days ago

    RE: Falling deeper into depression

    You better start same as like him. Tell him that you are my king and you are my one and only love. And find another one to say that someone thinking of you right now and touching themselves..

    And at the end be with the person you love then you will be happy.
      • 14 days ago
        I'm so sorry, my love. This is tough for anyone to deal with. Have you been seeing a therapist? You said you don't know if you could "ever trust him again." If there's no trust, then there really isn't much of a relationship left. For me, as an objective reader, I hope you will get out of this relationship as I know how toxic relationships can become without trust. You will end up feeling crazy. You will end up feeling like the problem is you. You will wind up trusting NO ONE, not even yourself. Looking the other way can cause this to happen to you. You won't even recognize yourself underneath the weight of all of your insecurities that this person has bore into you. I don't want this for you. But I know you have a lot invested and to completely sever ties, might not be feasible for you right now. Or maybe you still have hope for the relationship. I would set a bottom line to your partner: Couple's therapy or live separate lives/separate. Once again, I'm so sorry you are being faced with this. You've already lost so much --don't lose yourself. Set your bottom line. If he wants to be with you, then you both need to get couple's therapy.
      • 14 days ago
        No need couple therapy. Separate lives/separate.
  • 11 days ago

    RE: Falling deeper into depression

    He came here but did not even tell me to meet for once. If I understand if he sleep with any senior women he used to know then he will lose me forever.

    Smart people learn from cheating but never do it over and over again.
    Some dummies keep cheating and never learn from there. Those never understand what is love.
  • 11 days ago

    RE: Falling deeper into depression

    He came here but did not even tell me to meet for once. If I understand if he sleep with any senior women he used to know then he will lose me forever.

    Smart people learn from cheating but never do it over and over again.
    Some dummies keep cheating and never learn from there. Those never understand what is love.