• 5 months ago

    I am tired of being suicidal and unhappy.

    So I know there is something off about me. I have had multiple suicide attempts and self harming episodes each week for pretty much as long as I remember. Anytime anyone says anything that I percieve as a negative comment against me. I immediately go to suicide and I feel manic. I think no one loves me or care about me and I'd be better off dead. It's affected my personal relationships so deeply it's scary, my mom says I'm bipolar. My friends say I'm angry all the time. My fiance just cries with worry and fear over me and says he's a bad boyfriend. I feel destructive and I'm tired of this repeating cycle. I wanna be happy and be able to be sad without going into a suicidal rage and negative thinking pattern... I'm just getting sick of it and so is everyone else. Any advice or ways to direct me?


  • 5 months ago

    RE: I am tired of being suicidal and unhappy.

    Have you ever listen this song "Everything I Need" singer Skylar Grey


    your love will love you more if you can sing
  • 5 months ago

    RE: I am tired of being suicidal and unhappy.

    Hi Erickahopman,

    Have you ever seen a Psychiatrist for diagnosis and getting on meds, and even more so, have you ever seen a therapist? Medication alone is not enough, but when it's needed, it gives you the boost needed to be able to then work on the issues you have with a trained therapist.

    THis is something you can't do alone and need professional help for or it will just continue to escalate, as it apparently has.

    So please, seek professional help! You deserve to be doing and feeling better! This is not the life that you or anyone should have to endure! There IS help for you, but you have to do your part in getting that help and once you are with a therapist, do the work! It's not easy, but if you're willing to do the work and everything you have to do to get better, it's well worth it!

    Dying is not the solution - I promise you! I'm sure it feels like it at times, but it's not! That's your depression talking - refuse to listen to it!

    Again, please seek out help! If you need a referral, see your primary doctor and tell him/her what you need. You are worth it!

    There IS HOPE!

      • 5 months ago
        Absolutely true! I have also had multiple suicide attempts, both of which landed me in the hospital to endure a great deal of pain, emotional and physical. If I could go back in time, I would tell my younger self that there is help out there and that suicide isn't the answer.

        After my second attempt I was put on a medication that finally helped me, and who knows, maybe that's what you need. Don't feel ashamed to ask for help. That was a hard part for me too, but once I finally said it to my doctor, I felt a huge weight lift off my shoulders.

        Remember this though: sometimes it takes time to find the right psychologist, psychiatrist, or therapist. I've seen a number of different therapists before I found the one that would help me. In other words, shop around if you have to.

        I know what it feels like to be hopeless. I've hit rock bottom many many times, and at the time it felt like the only escape was death. But that was a lie that I told myself, because I needed a cure for my sickness. Just because it's a mental health issue doesn't mean it's not a serious disease. In your case, I hope you can be strong and say the words, "I need help", to your doctor.

        Look at it this way: you have nothing to lose. And if you ever want to talk, I am ALWAYS available. I'm not a professional, but I've been through it all, and I came out great on the other side. Email me any time if you want to: [email protected]