• 21 days ago

    looking for answers

    i am a 22 year old female with bipolar II. i just moved away from my family and friends who i have been extremely close to for the past 10 years. i love with my boyfriend and he’s so supportive but lately all i can feel is loneliness. nothing brings me joy besides going home to see my people. i can’t move back because i have a great job opportunity here. all i want is to have one day where i don’t break down crying for absolutely no reason. i’ve started self harming again (something i haven’t done in almost 2 years) and i am so disappointed in myself. i’m looking for any advice besides the usual “find a hobby, exercise, sleep on a schedule, take your meds, etc.” because i’m doing all of these things and more but absolutely nothing has made a difference. please help. i can’t keep living life like this.

Responses

  • 13 days ago

    RE: looking for answers

    Hi,

    I am very sorry you are hurting so much right now.
    I have bipolar 2 myself, so I sympathize.
    I don't think you are breaking down and crying for no reason...I think it's pretty obvious you are having a really tough time coping with being away from everyone and everything very close and meaningful to you, your whole support system. If going back home is a source of joy for you, then maybe you should pass up the job opportunity and put yourself first.

    Are you on any kind of medication for the bipolar? Are you seeing a therapist? I'm not implying that meds or a therapist will solve the problem, but getting on the right meds AND staying persistent with taking them definitely stabilizes you from going further down the big black hole of depression, and a therapist can definitely you to try to identify the source of what's causing you all this pain.
    If you are self harming again, that means it's getting worse and you need to seek help. In the end if moving back home is what it takes, then set your priorities straight...is a job worth a life filled with pain and misery? We work to live and not live to work, you can always find another job, but if you let yourself live like this, you might not be able to go on for much longer without, god forbid, something bad happening.

    Hugs,
    Gabi