• over 1 year ago

    Newly diagnosed, and very scared

    I am 68 years old, I had been having memory problems, losing things, and not understanding or figuring out stuff...I dismissed it as just old age...but it got worse...my adult granddaughter came for a visit and noticed I was repeating myself, I left the refrigerator door open several times, then I left a small pot of water to boil and laid down while she was outside swimming....I forgot about it and she came in, by that time the water had dried up and the pot was burning...Oye Vey...not good..I realized I needed to go to my doc...referred to a neurologist who ran tons of tests...turns out 2 months ago she informed me and said that dreaded word Alzheimer's...I feared it deep inside all along as my father, his dad (my grandfather), and his brother all died with Alzheimer's/Dementia type condition...it was inevitable that I would carry the gene. Now I have been taking Aricept which has help some...I still get frustrated when reading or using my computer, and making some long term plans for my care in the future....it has not been easy I feel into a very deep depression, just thinking about losing my independence and my mind...it took almost a month to dig myself out of my "black hole" of depression and stop all the "static" (horrible thoughts)
    in my head. To be honest I am scared...I have lived alone since I was 46...when my husband past away from complications as a result of a serious accident....never remarried..I learned to take of those thing that husbands usually do around the house...so I really valued my independence...as time went by I enjoyed my grandchildren and now a great grandma of a beautiful sweet 2 year old girl Willow Grace....Sadness comes and goes, and it takes every part of me, to avoid the dreaded "black hole".