• 5 days ago

    Why can't I let go....

    I've been in this unhealthy relationship with this guy for almost 2 and a half years. He is physically abusive at times, because my words hurt him worse then any physical abuse could ever he says. So basically I ask and deserve it because the truth hurts. He also lies and hides so much from me from small to big things. He has talked to other women planned dates and just here recently he actually cheated well that I know of anyways. Honestly I should have left him the day I found out he was talking to another female planning on a lunch date or if not that day then most definitely should have left the day he put hands on me. In past relationships before him after my separation from my kid's dad I had no issues walking away from guys for physical abuse, for lying, for being controlling, ect. In fact soon as I recognized any negative behaviors I didn't like then I was pretty much over it and gone. Just like that hardly giving any explanations or chances for change I would just be done with it and them. But why is this relationship so difficult for me to walk away from why haven't I left I fell in love with a man who obviously wasn't what he seemed I seriously thought for certain he was the one I had never felt so sure of anything ever in my life and it sucks at just how wrong I was He has definitely hurt me way beyond repair and I don't believe I could ever trust him ever. Each day is just more torturous then the day before Exhausted constantly on guird of what he says how he says it trying to find prove of the decetful things he does it's made me crazy I am now a crazy unhappy bitchy girlfriend because he unleashed the person I hate being but can be if I am hurt thanks for any insight I guess maybe I'm just venting

Responses

  • 5 days ago

    RE: Why can't I let go....

    If you want to stay with him then careful about your word with him since he put his hand on you. And once you find out that his has been cheating why did not you serious talk to him with the evidence you got about cheating and you may ask any of his best friends or family members to talk with him about temporary cheating mater. Because once you have evidence his close friend or family definitely believes in you and would help you to stop his temporary last. This is not only destroy you but also destroying him as well. I do not think he has that brian to understand. Good luck
      • 4 days ago
        So you think that a physically violent guy is going to listen to his gf lecturing him about cheating? I don't. No matter how carefully she chooses her words. And he's unlikely to listen to his friends or family either.

        OP, you shouldn't have to walk on eggshells all the time . That isn't what love is about. Get out now, while you still can.
  • 4 days ago

    RE: Why can't I let go....

    He is narcissistic. And it's not your fault but it is hard to get away from them. He has made you believe it what's wrong with you, but it is what's wrong with him. He is also a sociopath and has no feelings for anything but himself. Get away and never go back.
  • 4 days ago

    RE: Why can't I let go....

    Before I go any further, please take this to heart - nobody, but nobody deserves to be abused. And nobody has the right to put their hands on you.

    Your pathetic apology for a boyfriend is not going to change, not now, not ever, so don't hold your breath. Imagine a friend came to you and told you what you just told us. What would you tell her? Would you tell her to suck it up and stay for "love"? I bet you wouldn't.

    You say you have a child... why are you putting your child through this? And don't go imagining that s/he doesn't know about the abuse because children know way more than they let on. They also learn by example... Do you think you are showing her/him what a loving relationship looks like?

    Can you give me ONE good reason for you to stay? And don't say "love". Love is so very overrated. Here's an idea - take a sheet of paper and write down all the reasons to stay on one side and all the reasons to leave on the other. Take a long, long look at what you've written. Now you tell me why you want to stay.

    Finally, please be aware that an abuser will never change, usually the abuse just escalates. Please leave before it's too late for you ... or your child.

    You deserve so much better than this miserable existence.