• 3 months ago

    Unhealthy relationship

    My boyfriend is 59. I am 61. We have been together 3 years. We have been living together 1 year. I have learned he has a very short fuse. There is not much communication between us. I am always first to say “I love you”. No hugs, kisses, or sex anymore. He sits on the sofa every night with a throw over him and proceeds to jack off. I am wondering if this is normal? I don’t think so. I do love him, but I am beginning to think he has a sexual problem, or is just not interested in me anymore. He has been through a lot in his life. He was raised by his grandmother, was married has 3 grown children he never sees, as his exwife moved out of state with the children before divorce was final, they were 12 and under.


  • 3 months ago

    RE: Unhealthy relationship

    Hi No he is not normal, and how can you love such a bum, for me its really best you do move on and quick.

    Pack your bags time you need more love than he can ever give you, as his love is only in his hand.

  • RE: Unhealthy relationship

    This is not normal, and you being unhappy is enough to mean that the situation unacceptable. Have you had a direct conversation with him about this? Telling him how you feel? If not, is there a reason why? I'm wondering what you mean by him having a short fuse -- do you feel threatened or unsafe? If so, that's definitely a problem that needs to be addressed. Has he physically harmed you -- do you feel in danger? If so, it would probably be wise to leave. Please feel free to share more so we can help more.

    As for him having a difficult history, it seems that knowing this helps you to empathize with him. That can be very helpful in staying connected and working on a relationship, but sometimes people allow this to overshadow current issues. So, they accept current behaviors (based on empathy and caring) that are really unacceptable. Whatever his history, he is still responsible for his current actions. If he is willing to work with you on some things (and you feel safe with him), that's one things. But if not, then you are in a very different situation -- and maybe an unacceptable one.