• 28 days ago

    Codependent parent

    Children are completely distinct person from the parent. Codependents parents often think of their off springs are oath to complete their incomplete missions or tasks parents missed. From this, parents often have high expectations, that leads to various manipulations, pain or suffering and pressuring their off springs. Whenever unfortunate situation happen, codependent parents tend to victimized themselves and put the blames on others. In a natural and actual parenting, parents have to take their off springs as a distinct person from their own spiritual gene, children are not a puppet to complete what their parents’ incompleteness, children have the right to be respected and freedom of speech must compulsorily prioritize as important as air, food and water. Often codependent parents are adhesive to their children, adjudged them by comparison own children with others’ whenever children failed to do as what has demanded.

    Extensive numbers of children codependent parents complain that speaking with their parent is like ‘talking to a brick wall”. In fact, one doesn’t speak with a codependent parents as much as to them. No matter how valid the arguments, the codependent parents will not be moved in their position, and remain adamant. Instead, even when presented with irrefutable facts that would cause a normal person to reconsider and reevaluate their position, the codependent parents will either refute the facts or move onto a different argument without addressing the point being made. Codependent parents, parrot their phrases and sentences, consider as doubled-standard brain washing technique that has being strongly extensively practiced by most codependent parents throughout the century; thinking they must maintain control at all costs, these acts result in expecting a level of devotion and love from their children that is unhealthy and unnatural. This creates a dramatic role reversal of the parent-child relationship and turns it into a vampire-alike dynamic rather than a mutually beneficial one.

    Often the codependent parents manipulate their off springs subtly. The most effective form of manipulation is the kind that you can never be called out for directly. Examples include the silent treatment, passive aggressive comments, denial of wrong doing and projection, among others. The codependent parents will leave the child in a state of confusion, putting children in the wondering who is really “the bad guy and the devils” by placing a shadow of guilt, other words, making children pointing fingers at themselves. The children who live with a codependent parent are usually negative minded, great liar, have low self-esteem and lack of motivation or probably encounter frequent suicide attempts. The ultimate reason why this genre of parents manipulate their off spring is simply they don’t know any other ways to communicate with the adult-child who is beyond their direct control. Thus, they will manipulate with finances, emotion, guilt and any other possible tools at their disposal to maintain the imbalance of the codependency.